Alone
by WriterRoxxy
Summary: Brennan has been alone her whole life. Everyone has left her. has it finally driven her over the edge? Rating T for detailed scences. R&R makes me a happy person! VERY ANGSTY
1. Blades on my heart

**Alone**

Ok, so don't quite know where this came from, I am now on study leave, and since I hate study, that may mean quite a few stories for you guys!

Ok here goes…

Oh and you know I don't own anything! Otherwise I would be Brennan, and Booth would be my lover. Ha-ha

This song is very much inspired by the song Little House by The Fray, who are by the way amazing!

I'm putting a rating of T on this one for later scenes of distress, but let me know if you think it should be upped.

Not for young readers. Really, don't come complaining to me.

Dr. Temperance Brennan was a solitary character, she liked to keep herself to herself, build walls, that admittedly she hated, but still she liked being alone, her thoughts the only friends.

She had never looked at Angela and Hodgins and felt sad, she always understood that the 'love' that they said they had, was just a simple rush of endorphins, but ever since Angela had informed Temperance of her engagement, she couldn't help but feel a little sad that no one was there for her, no one for her to think about.

And that brought her to Seeley Booth, her partner, and friend. Whom she loved. No she didn't. She told herself this every night, she simply felt different because they had spent so much time together recently. That was it. End of.

She then remembered the hatred she felt towards Cam and Tessa. His girlfriends, sure she has other reasons for hating Cam, but the prominent one in her mind, was that she claimed the one thing Temperance had ever wanted. No, she cursed herself for the feelings going through her mind.

But now, sitting on the couch in her lounge staring around her living room, she felt cold. She felt so alone. No one was there; there were no pictures of her and friends on her walls, no pictures of anything. She sighed, not that anyone could hear, and drank down the last drop of her bottle of wine.

Her eyes grew heavy, but she refused to block the tears that were pouring out unwillingly, by closing them. She remained there, not moving, hardly breathing, thinking about all the people who she had ever loved. Her family. Sully. Yes Sully, she went back over it in her mind, she had loved Sully, and regretted not going with him. So much. Every day. But he had left her, like everyone else.

The more she thought about Sully, the more she thought about Booth. And how, even though she would never admit it, she did love him. She was scared. Something that she had never been. After her parents had left, she had always told herself that fear would only hold her back form what she could achieve, so she banished any fear, making her the cold person she was today.

Booth was the one person who had crumbled those walls even slightly. Sully had tried, but failed. Whereas booth, Booth. He had scaled them and jumped right over. He meant so much to her, that she wondered why nothing had ever happened between them two.

For the first time in her life, she said it aloud, 'I love you, Seeley Booth'. He was not there, but the courage it took just confessing it to herself, drained her. She rose up, and moved swiftly to the bathroom, swaying slightly from the wine, the streams of tears from her eyes to cheeks never stopping.

Disturbing thoughts were going through her head. She wondered why nobody had ever told her that they loved her. Sure her parents had, and Angela had, but that was unconditional, and in the case of Angela she wondered about pity.

She turned on both taps, letting the water cascade into the tub, filling swiftly before moving to the cupboard, to fetch the last element. She found it quickly, and before moving, a last thought of Booth rushed though her head. Why did she love him so much? Why didn't he love her back? Now there was no stopping the tears.

She left her clothes in a pile, not thinking, the drink and her state of mind taking over, leaving her body in autopilot, climbing into the bath, letting her body be enveloped by the water, up to her shoulders, she lay down and sighed deeply.

She repeated her earlier statement of love before drawing the blade against her skin, and enjoying the cool feeling of the rush of blood, it would have hurt, had she not consumed as much alcohol as she had. But with each cut on her left arm, the rush and release of feeling pooled in her brain. After a few minutes, her mind went hazy, the whole tub was crimson now, and she was wavering in and out of conscious. Just as she had wanted. Release.

She had decided a long time ago, that she was not going to let anyone else walk out of her life, and now, she had decided that she would walk out of theirs, no going back. She lay back, and fell unconscious, blade falling out of her right hand, to rest of her partially wet stomach. And there she lay.

Seeley Booth was alone. He was sitting in his apartment wishing he was with her. All his thoughts were about her, all his dreams featured her, his fantasies always had a lingering blue lab coat.

The feelings were stronger than ever tonight, quite what had possessed him to drive to her apartment, he would never know, but he was still speeding down the familiar route to her house.

Upon arriving he banged on the door, he knew she was home; after arriving at the Jeffersion only to find her presence not filling her office, or leaning and peering over a gurney. He waited, until pulling out his keys. After the fridge incident, and Epps managing to get into her apartment, he had insisted she give him a key, just for emergencies. His classified this moment, as a passion emergency, tonight he was going to confess to his idol that he loved her.

He swung the door open, and could hear running water, 'Bones' he called out, but got no reply. Contuinng through the house, he eventually found his way into the bathroom.

Nothing could have prepared him for what he was about to see. He had always had a frequent fantasy of Temperance in the bath, nothing on, but this was not that fantasy, there was blood. Everywhere. And she lay in the middle, head almost all the way under the water. He rushed over and pulled her up and out of the bath. She coughed and spluttered, and he tried to work out what had happened to her. That's when he saw her arm, that's when he saw the cuts. She had done this to herself.

She had tried to take her life. He stood by her, in shock for a moment, before focusing back on her. Her eyes were opened slightly, and she seemed to be breathing. Flipping his cell out of his pocket he called the emergency services.

Still he wondered, why, what would possess her to take her won life? He loved her, and surely she must have known that somewhere in her heart. She breathed heavily, before trying to speak, involuntarily slipping in and out of consciousness.

She mustered up all her strength to look at him. She knew it was him from his touch and his smell, she could sense him. The tears were still falling from her eyes, and he stared straight into them, and sighed, unable to speak. He head was now resting on his legs, his jacket draped over her, avoiding the arm which was wrapped in a cream towel, which was turning worryingly redder by the second. 'Seeley…I…love'. And then she was gone, back into unconsciousness, while he lay there next to her, waiting for the ambulance to arrive and praying aloud to god to save her.

'I know, I love you too Temperance, I always have'.


	2. Content

Alone Part 2

Ok, so I wasn't planning a second chapter, but since you all asked so nicely.

Also I know the last chapter was quite dark and sad, and some of you said that you couldn't see Brennan going to those lengths. But I think that Brennan's character is a very extreme person, she doesn't do things by halves. And for this reason, I think that if she felt depressed enough, and had consumed enough alcohol, than anything could be possible from her. Also the things she sees everyday in life is enough to push anyone over the edge.

Bit shorter than the last one, I apologise. I am meant to be revising for my GCSEs though…As I said before in one of my other fics, why aren't there GCSEs in fanfic? (Yes, I'm English!)

………………………………………………………………………………………….

Booth hadn't moved from her bedside in four days. After he had found her, and pulled her out of the bath, he had called the paramedics. While in the ambulance, she was still losing blood. They said that she had lost too much. He said they should keep going.

They did, and pumped her full of more blood, and operated on her arm and lungs as they had been damaged in the bath.

Angela visited frequently, and as the wedding date loomed ever closer, she pushed it further and further back. Hodgins understood, Angela wasn't prepared to get married without her best friend there.

As anther day came to an end, and the sun set outside her hospital room, Seeley Booth set up camp in the uncomfortable chair once more, all the while holding tightly onto her limp hand.

…………………………………………………………………………………………..

On the morning of the fifth day she awoke. Startled she started to panic, disorientated. This soon woke Booth up, as he turned, put his hands on either side of her face, and whispered quietly 'Bones It's ok, I'm here'

She instantly relaxed, and let the tears flow freely again.

'What are you doing here…What am I doing here?' she was confused again, but happy that he was there with her.

'Shhh, Bones, its ok, your apartment…the bath…you…' He bit back his words, not wanting to admit to himself what she had tried to do.

Then it came out unconsciously 'Why did you do it Bones?'

The tears never stopping she tried to answer him but nothing worked. She looked down at her heavily bandaged arm and remembered. She had tried to leave this earth, and failed. She couldn't even mange to do that.

'Temperance….I found you.' Now it was his turn to cry.

She looked at him, and saw the pain running through his eyes.

'You weren't meant to….Booth'

She sat up now. She was confused, why had Booth come to find her?

'Why did you?' She finished. He just stared at her.

'I was worried, and obviously had good reason', his tone was rising, he was angry now. How could he leave her?

The tears never stopped their streams down her pale face.

'Booth, you didn't want me, you have Cam and Tessa and…' She had run out of women, and could hear how stupid she sounded.

'And then there is Hodgins and Angela, and Sully' Booth shivered at the mention of the persons' name who nearly took his bones away.

'It's always been you Temperance' he sat back down in his chair, his temper cooling instantly, not wanting to hurt her anymore.

'I……I love you Temperance' he used her first name again for effect. It worked.

'I love you too…' Her words melted into nothing, as his lips shot forwards and captured hers in a kiss, soft at first, deepening when he let her in. His hand snaked round the back of her head and lost itself in her hair, not wanting to ever be removed from the jungle of auburn curls. Her wrapped round his neck, not caring about the pain her arm was causing. She was happy. He was happy.

Together they were happy, simmering in the moment. Questions were left un-answered, but neither cared, as Seeley climbed next to her on the bed, and they both fell asleep in each others arms. Content.


End file.
